No I'm not advocating for Nike. I don't think I've ever even owned anything Nike made anyway. Just getting to my point. I have been stressing over this Florida Disney trip we are going on in a few days since it was first set, back in like Nov. when my hubby set the plans with the timeshare people. As if adding on to our house at the end of last year wasn't enough of an expense why shouldn't we go broke taking the kids to Disney just cause Jake is three and that's when we took Emily. I've long thought we should have waited until next year and money wasn't so tight.
Well, who the hell am I kidding money is always going to be tight. My husband and I are spenders not savers. We do what we want when we want. Why to you think we have this timeshare in Florida. Surprise trip Nov. '07 led to surprise purchase of said timeshare. But we love it and no way will we ever regret it. It's a given vacation every year. We know we're getting away no matter what. We are going cause we've been paying for it all year. {Sort of like a car payment.} But what more peace of mind is there than knowing you'll be getting away at a certain time. It's something to look forward to. always.
Sure, we do plenty of other stuff. Robs sister is getting married in August. She lives in Pennsylvania, a short ways away from Hershey park. Well we've never taken the kids there so we're hoping to take a side trip after the wedding for an extra day there. After Disney who knows if we can but we want to and will try our best to. We like to go places and do things and you can't take it with you so why not?
I know it's not always easy to get to do what you want thats why you really have to plan it. And do it for yourself. I've come to make sure I do something different that I have always wanted to do for my birthday. And of course make my husband do ti with me. I think he may have started it when for our anniversary one year he planned an overnight trip to Montauk for just the two of us. I knew nothing about it but my boss did as he showed up to work on day at lunchtime to take me away. He had planned it all and even pack my bag so I didn't have to do a damn thing. It was absolutely wonderful. We stayed across the road from the beach, went to a big breakfast buffet, my favorite meal. And then went out to the lighthouse something I had always wanted to do.
The next year for my birthday we took Emily and Jacob and went out to the Orient point lighthouse and stayed out there for a good part of the day. Again something I had never done. This year we went into the city. We walked across the Brooklyn Bridge, walked around Central Park and the New York Public Library. From now on my birthday is free reign for doing something I've always wanted to. We all get one day a year thats special to us we might as well make the most of it.
I had intended to eventually write about this here because it's something I feel strongly about. We are only here once you may only get this chance once so why not take it. I think I had gotten away from some of that thinking recently with the stress of life getting to me. We still don't even have the CO for my upstairs because the town needs a ridiculous amount of paper work and plans we didn't know we needed to have done. Of course getting that done means more $. And right now our money is going to be heading down to Disneyworld. And being its Jakes first trip it's about time I start living in that fact and not that we could have had all the house stuff done if it weren't for the trip. What the hell should I care if the town says it's ok to live in my house the way it is yet or not. We're not moving out of it, we're living in it and have our space no matter what. And we're taking the kids to Disney. As far as I'm concerned and in light of the passing of the third person from my high school class this year (we're only 34) I think everyone should be planning a trip. To Disney or anywhere you've wanted to go and never been. Anywhere your kids want to go. For an overnight , a week, a month. Whatever you can do now. They won't care how much money you left them, Ok maybe the will. But they'll have much better memories of you should they lose you too soon. Or as sick as it sounds vice versa, because you just never know!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Saturday, June 20, 2009
smell
My husband can tell you a have a very good sense of smell. It bothers him to no end sometimes but I don't think he sees how he can use it to his advantage. Not yet anyway. There is a woman I work with who wears the nastiest smelling perfume. Even though some patrons have even complained about it she still wears it cause its her scent. Days she works with me and she puts on a lot I have to stay on the other end of the desk because it'll make me sick.
We have three cats and I'm the one who cleans the litter box every morning. There are nights that I will wake up or having been woken up for some reason I can smell the box and I have to get up and clean it so I can go back to sleep.
Funny thing is I'm really not that bad with food smells. I guess maybe because I like most all of them. Only fish to a certain extent can bother me. Although my mother used to make perogies in oil. She did this once when I was pregnant with the twins. I don't think I've eaten one to this day. And maybe because we always went shopping and ate at every fast food place around when I was a kid I love them all and need to get my fixes in after smelling them.
Bodily functions when it comes to the kids really don't bother me too much. You gotta do it right. And mom usually gets to clean it up. When I was a page at the library I was in a storytime class where a little girl got sick. I immediately got paper towels and started cleaning her up. Other people would have ran for the parent right away. I felt bad for her and helped clean her off. I don't remember it as being gross or even smelling for that matter I just remember reacting and helping her clean herself off.
Dealing with the public we get our share of smelly people. Sometimes dirty too. You just kind of have to back away take a deep breath and go wash your hands sometimes. Certain days people reeking of smoke bother the hell out of me. Other days I take a good deep breath and inhale the smoke. Womens perfumes aren't too bad. Mens cologne, every once in awhile I ask what it is their wearing if I like it.
My husband doesn't wear cologne very often. He has one that I love and maybe if he wore it at home more often .... Well I'll leave it at that. He leaves at about 5:45am for work but always comes in to kiss me goodbye. He's all cleaned up and ready for the day and smells yummy. If he gave himself some extra time in the morning I could drag him back into bed with me most mornings. At night before we go to bed he might go into the bathroom and get cleaned up but he doesn't use the cologne unless we go out. I have since moved it into our bedroom and from time to time just spray it around the room. It's an extra pick me up for me and puts me in a great mood for when he does get home. Although as with any scent its takes on a little something else with whomever may be wearing it so it's better on than just in the air. I have tried to find some other colognes but what I like he usually doesn't like. I like helping guys that smell good at work. Sad part is sometimes they're really old but they still smell yummy.
He also has to wear a good deodorant. Not to block out the smell of him.. well maybe sometimes but the smell of the deodorant itself has to be good. I've learned I have my favorite there and since I'm the one who usually buys it, it's worth it going into a different store just to find it. There are too many that smell so bad to me it is the biggest turn off and I don't even want to get near my husband. I don't know if I'm crazy or not but smell is a major factor in whats going on. Or what could possibly be going on later in the evening.
We have three cats and I'm the one who cleans the litter box every morning. There are nights that I will wake up or having been woken up for some reason I can smell the box and I have to get up and clean it so I can go back to sleep.
Funny thing is I'm really not that bad with food smells. I guess maybe because I like most all of them. Only fish to a certain extent can bother me. Although my mother used to make perogies in oil. She did this once when I was pregnant with the twins. I don't think I've eaten one to this day. And maybe because we always went shopping and ate at every fast food place around when I was a kid I love them all and need to get my fixes in after smelling them.
Bodily functions when it comes to the kids really don't bother me too much. You gotta do it right. And mom usually gets to clean it up. When I was a page at the library I was in a storytime class where a little girl got sick. I immediately got paper towels and started cleaning her up. Other people would have ran for the parent right away. I felt bad for her and helped clean her off. I don't remember it as being gross or even smelling for that matter I just remember reacting and helping her clean herself off.
Dealing with the public we get our share of smelly people. Sometimes dirty too. You just kind of have to back away take a deep breath and go wash your hands sometimes. Certain days people reeking of smoke bother the hell out of me. Other days I take a good deep breath and inhale the smoke. Womens perfumes aren't too bad. Mens cologne, every once in awhile I ask what it is their wearing if I like it.
My husband doesn't wear cologne very often. He has one that I love and maybe if he wore it at home more often .... Well I'll leave it at that. He leaves at about 5:45am for work but always comes in to kiss me goodbye. He's all cleaned up and ready for the day and smells yummy. If he gave himself some extra time in the morning I could drag him back into bed with me most mornings. At night before we go to bed he might go into the bathroom and get cleaned up but he doesn't use the cologne unless we go out. I have since moved it into our bedroom and from time to time just spray it around the room. It's an extra pick me up for me and puts me in a great mood for when he does get home. Although as with any scent its takes on a little something else with whomever may be wearing it so it's better on than just in the air. I have tried to find some other colognes but what I like he usually doesn't like. I like helping guys that smell good at work. Sad part is sometimes they're really old but they still smell yummy.
He also has to wear a good deodorant. Not to block out the smell of him.. well maybe sometimes but the smell of the deodorant itself has to be good. I've learned I have my favorite there and since I'm the one who usually buys it, it's worth it going into a different store just to find it. There are too many that smell so bad to me it is the biggest turn off and I don't even want to get near my husband. I don't know if I'm crazy or not but smell is a major factor in whats going on. Or what could possibly be going on later in the evening.
grumpy old man
When we first moved into our house, about five years ago, I was warned about my next door neighboor to the right of our house. There was no welcome wagon or anything when we moved in what I learned was from the few people I met at the bus stop that also had kids. I was told the the old man next to us wasn't very nice. I didn't think much of it as he had waved hello a few times and seemed to talk and get along well with my dad when we put up our fence shortly after we moved in. I ran into him once outside of the block and didn't even realize it was him when he said hello. I felt bad but what can you do, we were still pretty new to the neighborhood.
We bought the house from and older woman who was moving to Florida because that was where her only daughter now lived. Her husband had died years before. Every once in awhile I try to find out how, just incase it was in my house. Haven't been able to find anything though. Every once in awhile we hear this loud bang always from the same spot above what was the living room before we added on and Rob will joke that it's Mr. Frank haunting us because we can never find any reason for the noise. Mrs. Frank did tell us some about our new neighbors to be before we bought the house. The old man next door had lost his wife after she had lost her husband. His son still lived, and lives with him, though I can't figure out how old he is. I have never had any contact with him but he looks about the same age as my husband and I. His daughter lives on the other side of him. I'm not sure if there's a husband around or not but there is a granddaughter. Never met the mom but the granddaughter had been friends with the girls that lived on the other side of us so she may have even been over once or twice. I think she is a year or two older than my boys.
The women at the bus stop told me how he called the police and or the town about the basketball hoop outside her yard and how it wasn't allowed in the street and he didn't like them playing in front of his house. I believe there was another incident or two but that was the one that stuck in my mind. I really didn't think badly about him from what i was told, figured it was just heresay.
I love being outside in my yard so my kids are outside a lot with me. They have tons of toys to play with including many balls and other items that may wind up over a neighbors fence. At first it wasn't too bad they'd lose a few balls, go over and knock and he'd get them for them. Or he'd even throw them back. After I guess too much of this he told my boys,"tell your dad i'm not your left fielder" and that he wasn't going to be retrieving any more balls for us. My husband put about 2 foot chicken wire fence above our 6 foot fence along the side of our yard the connected to his to catch the balls. Of course some still go over but now we never see them again. I hear him open his door shortly after and let his dog out and then the dog chews up whatever ball went over. I figure thats his right its his yard and the kids really need to watch what goes over from now on. If i was alone all day enjoying peace and quiet when and old woman lived next door and by her own admission never went outside, then she goes and sells her house to us with now four young noisy kids I may not be too happy about it either. So he's doing his best maybe. Having his fun letting his dog chew our stuff. If i were him I might do the same. Its obvious he watches everything as he reacts very quickly. Guess he has nothing better to do.
My son Robert loves remote control flying toys. He has had quite a few over the years. He knows to be very careful with the grumpy old man next door and hardly ever flies anything near the property line. One day we were out in the front him, me and little jake. Jake distracted him and it went over nasty mans fence. But it barely went over. Now he had a short fence seperating his front and back yards and he has a chain link seperating our front yard from his. We could see the flying wasp toy just a few feet into the backyard. He tried reaching it and couldn't quite make it. Now this was no cheap toy as most good remote control things are. I told him quickly jump in grab it and jump out. He did. Now Robert is also afraid of dogs so there's no way he'd have gone over if the dog was out. Within ten seconds of him jumping back out and into our yard nasty man was at his side door yelling at me. Yelling about how he has a dog and he's not responsible for anything that might happen if my son comes over his fence into his yard and the dog were to get him. And as he's yelling he's pointing his old crotchedy figure at me. I was pissed. But what are you going to do. I said he was in and out no one got hurt and walked away.
A few days later I noticed nasty man had some fencing delivered. I immediately thought you got to be kidding. Thinking he was going to put up new higher fence where Robert was able to jump over. Well it didn't go up right away but sure enough a few weeks later he's got brand new 6 ft stockade fence up. I thought it was too funny. Whats better is he must have it standing on something because his 6ft fence is a good foot higher than my six foot fence that runs along side it. I just have to laugh every time I look at it.
I have thought about maybe baking him a cake or some cookies to bring over to be the bigger person and apologize for all the balls and everything else that may have come in his yard. There was a period of time when just for fun Jake would throw anything he got his hands on over the fence if he could get it that high. Most of that stuff I believe came back. I still toy with the notion of doing it. Maybe when I bake all my christmas cookies I'll send over a bunch. Maybe. But for now I just let it be and hope none of my kids lets anything special get over that fence because they never will see it again.
We bought the house from and older woman who was moving to Florida because that was where her only daughter now lived. Her husband had died years before. Every once in awhile I try to find out how, just incase it was in my house. Haven't been able to find anything though. Every once in awhile we hear this loud bang always from the same spot above what was the living room before we added on and Rob will joke that it's Mr. Frank haunting us because we can never find any reason for the noise. Mrs. Frank did tell us some about our new neighbors to be before we bought the house. The old man next door had lost his wife after she had lost her husband. His son still lived, and lives with him, though I can't figure out how old he is. I have never had any contact with him but he looks about the same age as my husband and I. His daughter lives on the other side of him. I'm not sure if there's a husband around or not but there is a granddaughter. Never met the mom but the granddaughter had been friends with the girls that lived on the other side of us so she may have even been over once or twice. I think she is a year or two older than my boys.
The women at the bus stop told me how he called the police and or the town about the basketball hoop outside her yard and how it wasn't allowed in the street and he didn't like them playing in front of his house. I believe there was another incident or two but that was the one that stuck in my mind. I really didn't think badly about him from what i was told, figured it was just heresay.
I love being outside in my yard so my kids are outside a lot with me. They have tons of toys to play with including many balls and other items that may wind up over a neighbors fence. At first it wasn't too bad they'd lose a few balls, go over and knock and he'd get them for them. Or he'd even throw them back. After I guess too much of this he told my boys,"tell your dad i'm not your left fielder" and that he wasn't going to be retrieving any more balls for us. My husband put about 2 foot chicken wire fence above our 6 foot fence along the side of our yard the connected to his to catch the balls. Of course some still go over but now we never see them again. I hear him open his door shortly after and let his dog out and then the dog chews up whatever ball went over. I figure thats his right its his yard and the kids really need to watch what goes over from now on. If i was alone all day enjoying peace and quiet when and old woman lived next door and by her own admission never went outside, then she goes and sells her house to us with now four young noisy kids I may not be too happy about it either. So he's doing his best maybe. Having his fun letting his dog chew our stuff. If i were him I might do the same. Its obvious he watches everything as he reacts very quickly. Guess he has nothing better to do.
My son Robert loves remote control flying toys. He has had quite a few over the years. He knows to be very careful with the grumpy old man next door and hardly ever flies anything near the property line. One day we were out in the front him, me and little jake. Jake distracted him and it went over nasty mans fence. But it barely went over. Now he had a short fence seperating his front and back yards and he has a chain link seperating our front yard from his. We could see the flying wasp toy just a few feet into the backyard. He tried reaching it and couldn't quite make it. Now this was no cheap toy as most good remote control things are. I told him quickly jump in grab it and jump out. He did. Now Robert is also afraid of dogs so there's no way he'd have gone over if the dog was out. Within ten seconds of him jumping back out and into our yard nasty man was at his side door yelling at me. Yelling about how he has a dog and he's not responsible for anything that might happen if my son comes over his fence into his yard and the dog were to get him. And as he's yelling he's pointing his old crotchedy figure at me. I was pissed. But what are you going to do. I said he was in and out no one got hurt and walked away.
A few days later I noticed nasty man had some fencing delivered. I immediately thought you got to be kidding. Thinking he was going to put up new higher fence where Robert was able to jump over. Well it didn't go up right away but sure enough a few weeks later he's got brand new 6 ft stockade fence up. I thought it was too funny. Whats better is he must have it standing on something because his 6ft fence is a good foot higher than my six foot fence that runs along side it. I just have to laugh every time I look at it.
I have thought about maybe baking him a cake or some cookies to bring over to be the bigger person and apologize for all the balls and everything else that may have come in his yard. There was a period of time when just for fun Jake would throw anything he got his hands on over the fence if he could get it that high. Most of that stuff I believe came back. I still toy with the notion of doing it. Maybe when I bake all my christmas cookies I'll send over a bunch. Maybe. But for now I just let it be and hope none of my kids lets anything special get over that fence because they never will see it again.
Friday, June 12, 2009
crazy time
Rob and I have been talking about the real possibility of a number five lately. As soon as we think one way something else happens and we may go another. I think the biggest thing for me is knowing it's still a real possibility. I can't say Yes I definitly want another baby now. Actually I don't want one now, but in another year or so probably. There are some things we want to do with the kiddies we have before we add on. Luckily we are young enough we can say ok maybe in a year or so. By the time that year or so goes by maybe we'll be sure we're done. For me I can't just say, No more babies for me. Not quite yet anyway. I see all the benefits of keeping our family the way it is. But I still think I want just one more. Want to feel that baby inside me. The big issue for me is what if there is more than one. Thats the scary factor. I had twins first so I knew nothing else. I've had two singles since and it was just cake with one. Plus there were older siblings around to help out. What a big bonus. When I was pregnant with Emily my first sonogram showed two sacs. One baby didn't take. But right there Emily was almost a twin too. I have heard also that as you get older your chances of twins increase. Here I had almost two sets while I was younger so I think my chance of twins again after I hit 35 next year might be pretty darn good. This is something we would have to be ready for.
We would try for a certain time of year for a newbies brithday if we go for it. When spring comes things get really crazy around here when it comes to birthdays. We have a two in the family in April but once my birthday hits in May its crazy time. From May 17th, mine, to June 19th there are eight birthdays we celebrate. Thats not even counting the four friends I have that fall in there also. We have our timeshare week as soon as school gets out. The very end of june to early july. So theres finishing up with school and getting on the road to florida. Once we get back we have two more birthdays in July. I told my husband there is no way we could have another birthday fall into the crazy time. We'd be shooting for a winter birthday. No trying until the holidays hit! Practice beforehand, Sure! Now that may take a little bit of the fun out of it but theres no way I'm chancing that one. Besides I will always know the babies birthday as I have scheduled c-sections. My only real surprise would be the sex.
And now I may start off another discussion. Rob always wants to know. I don't and will not if there is one more. Had to know with the twins. Found out with Emily for him. Jake, told him no way we're finding out. Same thing if theres another. Now if there winds up being two... well, maybe. Maybe there won't be another at all. We were going to start around these holidays but theres a big trip we want to take the kids on we just can't do with a newbie or two. So next holiday season we may be working on it. From where I sit now we will be. In another year you never know what can happen so there is no guarantee. I may not be so lucky and get pregnant as easily as I have been blessed with in the past. Maybe I'll be satisfied with the new baby, a puppy, my husband is determined to get this summer. Anything is possible.
We would try for a certain time of year for a newbies brithday if we go for it. When spring comes things get really crazy around here when it comes to birthdays. We have a two in the family in April but once my birthday hits in May its crazy time. From May 17th, mine, to June 19th there are eight birthdays we celebrate. Thats not even counting the four friends I have that fall in there also. We have our timeshare week as soon as school gets out. The very end of june to early july. So theres finishing up with school and getting on the road to florida. Once we get back we have two more birthdays in July. I told my husband there is no way we could have another birthday fall into the crazy time. We'd be shooting for a winter birthday. No trying until the holidays hit! Practice beforehand, Sure! Now that may take a little bit of the fun out of it but theres no way I'm chancing that one. Besides I will always know the babies birthday as I have scheduled c-sections. My only real surprise would be the sex.
And now I may start off another discussion. Rob always wants to know. I don't and will not if there is one more. Had to know with the twins. Found out with Emily for him. Jake, told him no way we're finding out. Same thing if theres another. Now if there winds up being two... well, maybe. Maybe there won't be another at all. We were going to start around these holidays but theres a big trip we want to take the kids on we just can't do with a newbie or two. So next holiday season we may be working on it. From where I sit now we will be. In another year you never know what can happen so there is no guarantee. I may not be so lucky and get pregnant as easily as I have been blessed with in the past. Maybe I'll be satisfied with the new baby, a puppy, my husband is determined to get this summer. Anything is possible.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
rain on wednesday
I'm actually off this wednesday night as Rob is going to a Yankee game. I'll have the kids to myself for the evening which doesn't happen all that often. We'll make breakfast for dinner or some other yummy munchies. Usually watch a movie and picnic on the living room floor. Or just hang out and maybe play some games. I really like having this time with them.
Unfortunately Emily has a baseball game. I won't get to veg out in my pj's all day cause theres no work for me. I won't get to relax with the kiddies cause we've got to get to baseball. She loves playing, but I feel bad for the other kids who will either get left home to watch each other or dragged along to the game. I am no soccer mom. I enjoy watching Emily play. I don't enjoy sitting outside freezing, chasing Jacob around and usually missing whats going on in her game because i have three other children to think about. My husband is all about the sports and since he played everything every season and was the baby i don't think he gets my point of view. He of course has become the main coach on her team. Didn't sign up for it, just happened. If I could go with just her and watch just her and think about just her maybe i'd actually enjoy it. I might even be able to keep track of the score of the game. If I go without the other kids on wednesday I know i'll be worrying about what they are doing at home. If I bring them I'll just be trying to keep Jacob busy and out of everyone elses hair and counting the minutes till the game is over. So is it really that bad of me to be hoping for rain?
Of course if theres enough of it there won't be any game. No dilemma of who's going. Though then there may not be any Yankee game either and my husband could be home too. It does take a hell of a lot more rain to wash out a yankee game though. I'm tempted to ask Emily what she'd rather do, veg at home or go to the game. That of course would be really wrong and I wouldn't do it. She signed up to play she should show up to play its only fair to the rest of the team. But I am tempted.
I am not a joiner, never have been. I'll watch sports. I won't usually play them. In school, gym class was pass or fail. I knew I could be unprepared for gym twice each quarter and still pass. Of course I was unprepared eight times every year and still passed. I sometimes even failed a quarter being unprepared too many times but passed for the year. By the time I was a senior the teachers got smart and started making you write a little report if you were unprepared for class. By then I was on to cutting anyway so i'd miss as many that way and still pass.
My big boys never got signed up for anything. I never had the money. Also never had the time. Or at least I felt I had enough going on with living at home, having my mom babysit so i could work, having them in two different schools, and their father having them every weekend. It was a crazy enough schedule why would I add anything else to it on purpose. I do feel bad for them now as they see Emily and eventually Jacob join things. I think now that they are older and can do it free at school they don't even have the desire because they never did it before. Which also makes it worse to make them come along. Most games I'm working and Rob takes them all. He doesn't feel the mommy guilt I do.
So rain on wednesday.... I really am hoping so. I can spend time with all my kids and not feel like one is getting favored for a little while. Maybe thats where I have to adjust my thinking to that of a family with each of us having our own thing that the others may have to sacrifice some time for. And thats what makes us a family.
Unfortunately Emily has a baseball game. I won't get to veg out in my pj's all day cause theres no work for me. I won't get to relax with the kiddies cause we've got to get to baseball. She loves playing, but I feel bad for the other kids who will either get left home to watch each other or dragged along to the game. I am no soccer mom. I enjoy watching Emily play. I don't enjoy sitting outside freezing, chasing Jacob around and usually missing whats going on in her game because i have three other children to think about. My husband is all about the sports and since he played everything every season and was the baby i don't think he gets my point of view. He of course has become the main coach on her team. Didn't sign up for it, just happened. If I could go with just her and watch just her and think about just her maybe i'd actually enjoy it. I might even be able to keep track of the score of the game. If I go without the other kids on wednesday I know i'll be worrying about what they are doing at home. If I bring them I'll just be trying to keep Jacob busy and out of everyone elses hair and counting the minutes till the game is over. So is it really that bad of me to be hoping for rain?
Of course if theres enough of it there won't be any game. No dilemma of who's going. Though then there may not be any Yankee game either and my husband could be home too. It does take a hell of a lot more rain to wash out a yankee game though. I'm tempted to ask Emily what she'd rather do, veg at home or go to the game. That of course would be really wrong and I wouldn't do it. She signed up to play she should show up to play its only fair to the rest of the team. But I am tempted.
I am not a joiner, never have been. I'll watch sports. I won't usually play them. In school, gym class was pass or fail. I knew I could be unprepared for gym twice each quarter and still pass. Of course I was unprepared eight times every year and still passed. I sometimes even failed a quarter being unprepared too many times but passed for the year. By the time I was a senior the teachers got smart and started making you write a little report if you were unprepared for class. By then I was on to cutting anyway so i'd miss as many that way and still pass.
My big boys never got signed up for anything. I never had the money. Also never had the time. Or at least I felt I had enough going on with living at home, having my mom babysit so i could work, having them in two different schools, and their father having them every weekend. It was a crazy enough schedule why would I add anything else to it on purpose. I do feel bad for them now as they see Emily and eventually Jacob join things. I think now that they are older and can do it free at school they don't even have the desire because they never did it before. Which also makes it worse to make them come along. Most games I'm working and Rob takes them all. He doesn't feel the mommy guilt I do.
So rain on wednesday.... I really am hoping so. I can spend time with all my kids and not feel like one is getting favored for a little while. Maybe thats where I have to adjust my thinking to that of a family with each of us having our own thing that the others may have to sacrifice some time for. And thats what makes us a family.
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